Energy Vampires

According to the Law of Attraction we are to feel good in order to attract good things. I have found a few challenges with this. Especially when Energy Vampires are involved. Who is an Energy Vampire? Those people that make you feel drained every time you are with them or even spend just a few minutes talking to them. They are full of gossip, negativity, criticism, blame, judgement, drama, etc.

We all have problems, but these people don't care about your problems. They just want to tell you about theirs. Not only that, but they do not care about finding a solution either. They use your time and energy to share their woes, but nothing is ever done to improve the situation.

It is usually recommended to stay away from that person. What if that is not always possible? Worse that person is sucking away good energy so that you can't use the Law of Attraction in your favor. Then you feel that you have to start from square one to get yourself in a good mood again.

So what do you do if you can't remove these Energy Vampires from your life?

• First, after making sure there is just no way you can avoid this person, start setting your limits. Decide what you will no longer tolerate from this person. You can tell this person, "I will listen to you for 3 minutes only if you will take my advice on a solution or you yourself come up with a solution after your 3 minutes are up". If they get angry and decide not to talk to you any longer or spend time with you because you do no let them suck you dry, then better for you.
• Set boundaries. For example, you let the person know they are no longer able to pop in whenever they please. They can call first and if you are up to it then fine. Or if you need to go to a different room do so. Also, if the other person is over stepping her boundaries by getting into your business or being insulting, you let the person know that you are not tolerating it.
• Use "I" statements. " I get angry when you show up without calling first to check if I am busy or not."
• If you are tired, hungry, ill, stressed, or under pressure do your best to avoid Energy Vampires at all cost because they will deplete you further.

Eventually the Energy Vampires will stop calling because you no longer humor them. So this gives you the time & energy to meet more positive, loving, healthier, like minded people. Which makes you more positive so you will start to see better results in attracting your desires. Don't worry the Energy Vampires will find others to humor them, they will not be alone. Remember misery loves company. You do not have time for that. You have goals, desires and needs and can't afford it.

Please note that there might come a time when negative people do not affect you anymore. In fact, you make them more positive just by your presence. The above techniques have helped me in those situations where my positive energy is not making things better.

Five Keys To Success

"Why should we be in such a desperate haste to succeed and in such desperate enterprises? If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music he hears, however measured or far away."

                                -Henry David Thoreau





There are a few things that have helped me be successful in achieving goals and I will share them with you.

1. Learn to listen to your emotions and release them in a healthy way. When you are experiencing any negative emotion it is difficult to focus on your goals and it is impossible to attract a good outcome. In fact, negative emotions will only magnetize more things that will cause you to experience those bad feelings. However, be realistic and patient with yourself. Having emotions is being human, appropriate in many cases, and also a necessity.
2. Don't compare yourself to others. There will always be someone who is doing better, looking better and has more than you. You can't be number one at everything. You are on a different path than anyone else, and the key is to learn what that path is. Do not let your ego lead you astray. Your ego will tell you that you must get more, do more, be more because you do not measure up to others. However, your spirit will tell you that you are on a different path following a "different drummer." You are number one at one thing for sure. And that is in being you. There is no one else like you in this world. Learn to be the best you that you could be.
3. Have goals, but don't be so attached to them that you ignore the happiness that every day could bring. Most people are only happy until they reach a goal and to top it off it is only short lived. This is why people who make goals are always looking for what is next as soon as they reach it. The rush of happiness they get when achieving their goal quickly dissipates. Life seems gloomy and hard when you do not notice every day reasons to be happy. Life is what happens when you are busy making plans.
4. Take baby steps. Many people want to achieve their goals so bad that they try to sprint instead of taking baby steps. But in order to achieve success you have to take baby steps. When we see successful people we assume they became that way overnight. However, that is not the case. Every day they took baby steps to get themselves to where they are today. But people who do not realize this, try to go from point A to point Z without taking all of the baby steps in the middle. Not only is this overwhelming, stressful, and potentially dangerous, but also counterproductive.
5. Be selective as to who you spend your time with. Many success coaches say that we are the equivalent of the five people we spend most of our time with. This makes sense when you consider that when we are with someone we give them some of our energy and take some of theirs in return. This is called Phase Entanglement. If you spend much of your time with negative people who have no interest in improving their life and rather spend their time blaming external circumstances for what is not working, you will have the same negative energy resonance that they have which will only repel your desires from you.

Look to this day
For yesterday is but a dream,
and tomorrow is only a vision,
But today, well lived,
Makes every yesterday a dream
of happiness
An every tomorrow a vision of hope.
Look well, therefore, to this day.

- Sanskirt proverb

Tips for Life Improvement

The following are the first steps I recommend to people who say they are willing to do what it takes to improve their lives; to be their best selves and live the best life.

• Don't let present challenges bring you down and keep you from pursuing your goals. I agree that when you are putting out fires sometimes you end up being too drained to think about pursuing goals and dreams. However, I have learned that in order to move beyond the challenges you can't let go of your aspirations. When you lose faith in yourself and in accomplishing your dreams, you have less energy to enjoy in life. Which keeps you stuck where you are. It also makes you develop a feeling of hopelessness and helplessness.
• Learn to use your challenges and transform them into something positive. We all go through obstacles from time to time, they are part of life. But are you going to let hard times get the better of you or are you going to make some lemonade from the lemons? I read a story in Dr. Laura Schlessinger's book, Bad Childhood Good Life , about a woman complaining to her mother about her hard life. She was tired and wanted to give it all up. The mother then took the daughter to the kitchen and put three pots with water and food items to boil. One of them had and egg, the second one had carrots, and the third pot had coffee beans. After half an hour of boiling the items, the mother asked the daughter what she had learned. The daughter did not understand what she was referrring to. The mother explained,"..each of the three foodstuffs had been exposed to the same challenge: boiling water. The carrots went in strong and sturdy and then turned to mush. The egg went in fragile and ultimately turned hard. And the coffee beans changed the hot water around them-producing a wonderful aroma and a delight to the taste buds. 'So, my darling daughter, when the hour is the darkest and the trials are the greatest, how do you handle adversity? Are you a carrot that loses its strenght? Are you the egg that becomes tough and hardened? Are you the coffee bean that influences the universe in a positive, hopeful way?'
• Get a support group. Often times when you are ready for something new or to grow the people who you least expect hold you back. Although most of them have good intentions, they still keep you from being the best you can be. I recommend you start finding like minded friends to help you through your new journey. These people will give you higher energy advice and help think outside of the box. You may ask low energy people for advice, but it could be fearful, biased, negative and destructive. Not necessarily because they want to hurt you, but because they do not know any better. People who are serious about being their best and living their best life, surround themselves with the a positive support group that will help them through their journey.

"Be more in charge of the people you surround yourself with and invest yourself in. Choose groups and individuals who help you be and do your best, not wallow in negativity. Only hang around people who for the most part- nobody's perfect-live the kind of life which you aspire. Surround yourself with good people, even if they are not your family. Avoid bad influences like the bubonic plague."

                                 - Dr. Laura Shlessinger